Learning to ride the waves

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She told me to write it down. M.S.

heart beat

I think about you often I can see your face perfectly with your smile, it haunts my memory. I can here your voice and your laugh. We have been through so much together so much is unfinished. You are married now with a baby. I watch and can’t help to think that should have been me. I may never found someone that is going to love me the way you did…. ever. I was so young I couldn’t understand it. I didn’t even know who I was yet or what I wanted. Now I sit here and wonder my god was the timing off.. what If I never get a chance to feel love like that again in my life. Where did we go wrong what happened, life took us two separate ways you may not even like the person I am today. You may never read this, I may never get a chance to speak to you again.. ever.. I don’t know what happened  if it was timing or me being so young and unsure I don’t know I wish I had the answers. I wish I did. My eyes fill up with water when I think about you, I miss you being in my life and I am sorry for hurting you. I never wanted too. Maybe I’m being selfish wanting to here from you… because you are married and have a baby. You are happy I don’t want to ruin that.. I can’t help but to wonder what if that was me. I want to be loved and in love you always loved me and I never understood why. I couldn’t understand.

I have no idea where life is going to take me. No clue.  I miss you. I hope your doing great. I’m sorry for hurting you.



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This entry was posted on July 24, 2015 by in Uncategorized.
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